I feel my little one at every turn. It is in my being now. It is getting easier now to know when he/she is speaking / writing / feeling through me.
I am beginning to trust what emerges in myself, and listen to that. The listening now feels like a 7th sense or beyond, higher than intuition. It is opening to awareness of information and the true response within the fluid body to that.
What has emerged strongly in past weeks – and in the context of our Global Unified Field of listening – is that there are still others to hear.
The need to listen to the older children at such a high level, in the presence of the ‘incoming souls’ listening is very real.
In a recent therapy session with a mammy and baby, the mammy was amazed and moved at how engaged her little month old baby was with what we were doing, how we were all listening to each other through space and touch. She thanked me at the end of the session for treating her daughter with such respect. She had not seen that before, nor felt it so strongly in herself, and left our session feeling that her new truer communication with her little one was one bound in strength, clarity and honesty.
My sense over the past while is that I haven’t really been hearing my older children as deeply as I could. I mean, I listened to them with ears that I thought I understood their needs from a ‘mother knows best’ perspective, but in truth, I can’t actually teach them anything. That admission is so free-ing. It feels so spacious.
For the past few weeks, my son has been talking about his birth, his life in the womb, the time before birth – trying to work out the ‘rainbow’ and where people go, why they cannot come back… he has been showing me frustration in being with this lack of clarity. He shows it through his language, his impulsive reactions in connection with others, his physical well-being – his digestion. He has been saying that there should be a baby swimming in my belly now, where is it? He feels it is very small. He knows it is somewhere and that it is coming. My son is flighty, he is starry, he is spacious. He told me yesterday that he was in the stars. I heard that.
My daughter has been patiently waiting for me to hear her more, to listen more honestly to what she brings to the family. She is kind to me in my challenges to hear. She observes patiently as I ‘lose it’ with things that I can’t control and waits to welcome me back into the picture. She holds attention, she commands the room, she merges with experiences like no one I have ever met before. She kisses my belly reassuringly when her brother talks of a baby coming. She knows life and how to live it. She has no fear in her exploration of things. She doesn’t just jump in the puddle she becomes the puddle. She is fluid, she is earthy, she is embodied wisdom.
I listened recently to the call I had with Shelley Lemaire the month before this wise earthy bundle was born. It was wonderful to hear how intimately Shelley knew her, and painted the picture of her as she was informed it by her. It was comforting to know that my daughter had been heard in her truth by Shelley as she made her way to me physically. It was truly awesome to hear how she and I (eventually) could ‘tune in’ to her being and her birth by listening in open honesty. It feels so good to reconnect with that again.
And in listening to these (two) children who embody star and earth, or who may embody both and feel the confusion in that, it feels as though their stories relate intimately to the welcoming of someone/something new. It is as though their places and experiences are informing the bigger picture. And the knowing they can give to their mothers / mother earth.
I see in my children that they feel more heard. I have heard both of them laugh in their sleep since I have tuned in more. Real belly joy. I have felt how joyous it is for all of us to open to this level of listening, and I have seen too how my son processes this change within his little body. I have felt how challenging it is when I slip into old, ingrained patterns, and I feel that this awareness is how they are changing me fundamentally. Changing my knowing.
I know now there is relinquishing control. There is seeing; from a very new and different angle. There is no longer truth in thinking we ‘know best’ / must ‘protect’ / must ‘guide’. This goes beyond the cognitive understanding of peaceful parenting / teaching / ‘theruping’.
I know now there is beauty in knowing nothing. More than I ever have known, I know there is teaching from them, not teaching from me.
I know now there is a deeper dance between us, a following of experience, of laughter, and pain, at another level, beyond words. And that if we can trust more in this, the boundaries of individual needs are lifted. There is a unified flow of movement and love.
I know now there is a stronger communication , a resonance finer than sound or gesture or feeling, brighter than light, more sensitive than skin. It is the resonance of connection that comes with yielding to the darkness, and allowing the darkness to lead the way.
I know there is the biggest, widest, most awesome mutual receiving in the belly of the most sacred and precious mutual respect.
I know there is no separation. There is one-ness, unity. A totality that allows for more ease in weaving in and out of connection with each other.
And, I know there is more. Infinitely more.
© Babysoulbeam.com 2015